Square Top Lakes

Distance: 4.2 miles round trip
Elevation: 11,700 ft - 12,300 ft
Elevation Gain: 850 ft (net), 1,100 ft (cumulative)
Bathroom at the Trailhead: Yes
Dogs: Off leash
Critters: Golden Eagle, White Crowned Sparrow

Lower Square Top Lake as seen from the upper lake. Mt. Bierstadt in the background.

Square Top Lakes near Georgetown Colorado is a short tundra hike to two alpine lakes with incredible views. The entire trail is above treeline, which is always a treat for those like me who don't like slogging miles through the trees to get anywhere.

Looking down into the first valley

I chose this hike for the first hike of the 4th of July weekend because I needed to get my 15 year-old dog out for a short hike that was not overly rocky. Last year I had made it to the lower lake but ended up jogging back to the car as the thunder rolled overhead. This area is notorious for afternoon thunderstorms that will have you cowering in fear if you are careless and start late. On this trip, the skies stayed clear and I was able to lounge at the upper lake for an hour or more. There I saw a Golden Eagle flying against the mountainside. Even with my telephoto lens it was merely a spec against the expanse of rock.

Western Sky Pilot (Polemonium viscosum). It grows at high altitudes on dry rocky sites.

The trailhead for Square Top Lakes is at the apex of Guanella Pass. The lower parking lot is full of Mt. Bierstadt climbers and the upper lot contains overflow. Both lots have nice new bathrooms. The trail descends 100 ft into a small valley where is crosses a creek on a series of wooden bridges. It then rises quickly to a large rocky knoll. There were Buddhist payer flags strung across the rocks here and another hiker told me someone had died in an avalanche there. From this knoll, the trail descends another 100 ft before rising to the first lake. This lake is pretty, but the view from the upper lake is even better. Both lakes are nestled at the base of Square Top Mountain. That is an adventurous hike as well!

A small section of the upper lake

Wildflowers covered the tundra and at one point I tried to estimate their distribution. It seemed like there was one flower every six inches or so. I lost count of the number of species present but white and yellow seemed to be the predominate colors. On the broad shelf that borders the upper lake, tiny tundra flowers sprouted in crevices of every rock. I need to get myself a magnifying glass so I can examine these more closely.

Alpine Sunflower (Hymenoxys grandiflora). Also known as Old-Man-of-the-Mountain. They bloom in clumps from May to June and turns to face the sun.

On my way back down I lingered at the lower lake for a few moments. There I met Jack, a Chesapeake Bay Retrieve/Lab mix. This dog looked more like a Grizzly Bear than dog and he was shuffling through the water of the lake backwards shaking his hindquarters in a most un-lady like manner. The owners said he was trying to loosen rocks on the bottom with his front paws. This activity, combined with piteous whines was a site to behold. Occasionally, Jack would thrust the upper half of his body underwater like a duck feeding on grass and come up spouting. At last, we saw Jack bound out of the water with a 10-pound rock in his mouth. I wish I were so easily entertained. Still, if I were caught moving my hindquarters in a similar manner, I would be arrested for disturbing the peace! This vignette might just convince you that Square Top Lakes is great for dogs.

The White Crowned Sparrow (Zonotrichia leucophyrus) is a migratory songbird that mainly eats seeds. There were many of them singing away in the willows. I have a better photo on my Mayflower Gulch Wildflower Hike

If you check out Square Top Lakes, go early so you won’t have to run from the thunderstorms, which can pop up very quickly on Guanella Pass. Another great hike nearby is Silver Dollar and Murray Lakes.

The rock hound

Diamond Lake

Distance: 5.2 miles RT
Elevation: 10,100-10,940 ft
Elevation Gain: 840 ft


Diamond Lake in July looking south
Diamond Lake is a wildflower Mecca with hordes of shutter bugs circling round and around choice Columbine and Indian paintbrush much like Muslims orbit the Kaaba shrine. Depending upon when you go, you can find flowers lower down near the trailhead or up higher in the large meadow that borders the lake. Go too early e.g. May and June and you will end up trodding through large drifts of snow and soggy expanses of melt water. The lake itself can be shrouded in dark clouds at this time too, which does create its own photo opportunities. I suggest waiting until mid-July, however if you want to wallow in wildflowers.


The Colorado Columbine (Aquilegia ceorulea) grows in meadows, woodlands, rocks, scree from June to August. It is also Colorado's state flower.
Be emotionally prepared to feel the press of humanity if you join the Hajj on weekend. Not only must you get to the parking area very early, but also you will be bumped and prodded by the multitudes trodding by. The Fourth of July trailhead is also the starting point for Dorothy Lake and Arapahoe Glacier so for part of the route you will be joined by more serious hikers. Lake is stocked as well, so anglers join the procession to the lake, some carrying inflatable dinghies to float in.


Chiming Bells (Mertensia ciliata) blooms from June to August along streams and waterfalls.
The trail begins to climb right off the bat and the hiker will traverse small meadows and forested slopes. Flowers exist in both places so keep your eyes open for more rare finds. There are several water crossings that are not arduous and which attract their own flock of water loving flower species like the ubiquitous Chiming Bells, which grow in huge clumps anywhere there is water.


Indian Paintbrush (Castilleja miniata) can be found all over the state in meadows, sagebrush flats, and meadows. It blooms from May to September.
At 1.2 miles the trails splits. Take the left fork and continue until you reach a pleasant waterfall. At this point the trail bends back upon itself and heads back down the valley. I find this feature frustrating and don’t know why the trail does just head straight up to the lake with out looping back. This is a psychological impediment I know. It is hard for us driven Americans to ever think of going backwards. This back tracking is also the steeper portion of the trail. It is in a darker forest with fewer views. Early in the season this is also where the snow can linger.


Diamond Lake
At the top of this steep pitch is a broad meadow with logs strategically placed to protect the sensitive plants. The views return at this point but it is best to sally to the lake where there are plenty of places to sit and snap pictures. I particularly like the stunted conifers here, which are wind blown and artistic. Their flag shapes are testament to the winds that flow down the valley from the north. On more than one trip to the lake, I have been hailed on, so bring rain gear even if the weather is pleasant in the morning.


Diamond Lake in May. A lot colder and more snow
Like the participants in the Hajj, you will be spiritually renewed by your journey to Diamond Lake and if you can go on a weekday, then you will reach this renewal without paying the price without having to follow the butt of the person in front of you.

Colorado National Monument: Rim Rock Drive

Length: 23 miles


The Colorado National Monument is one of those must do’s for any Coloradoan. So for all you Denverites, get thy hinnies on I-70 and GO WEST. To sweeten the experience, I suggest a little Colorado wine tasting while there. Note of caution…the Rim Rock Drive is precipitous. Save the wine tasting for AFTER the drive.

The monument is part of the greater Colorado Plateau. This expanse includes the better-known features of Bryce and Grand Canyon as well as Arches National Park. This plateau fills the void between the Rocky Mountains and the Great Basin in Nevada. The average elevation of the plateau is around 5,000 ft so all you Denverites will feel at home.


Many of the overlooks in the Monument gaze out on 2,000 ft of sheer rock faces or detached rock towers. Like the Black Canyon of the Gunnison, the primary process at work in the Colorado National Monument is erosion. The accumulated soils have made colorful bands in the rock, and the varying hardnesses of the rock have resulted in both pillars and deep canyons.


The photos in this post are a year old. The weather was delightful and the park uncrowded. Alas, I had the dogs with me so I was unable to hike into any of the canyons, but the drive was worth doing regardless. I do remember that finding the entrance to the Monument was not easy. You can get to it from either side and there were no signs from the freeway. I would recommend reviewing the National Park Service’s directions to the Monument before heading out.

Mills Lake

Distance: 5 miles round trip
Elevation: 9,240 ft-9,940 ft
Elevation Gain: 700 ft
Critters: Hordes of Tourists

Mills Lake

I often neglect poor Mills Lake as I blow past it on my way to Black Lake. It is a destination in and of itself for many of the tourists who visit Rocky Mountain National Park every year. At five miles it is not a killer but it provides some level of bragging rights for the hordes of Texans and other flatlanders that descend on the park every year.

(On the left: Typical Trail Segment). This year we ended up at Mills Lake by default because the trail to Black Lake was still covered in snow. I am beginning to sound like a broken record every time I say that this season…sigh.

The trail to Mills Lake begins at the park’s shuttle park-n-ride across from the Glacier Gorge Campground. Don’t even bother heading up to the trailhead yourself unless you are willing to fight for a spot and be situated by 6 AM. This shuttle park-n-ride is a significant improvement to the park. Its expansion was completed sometime back in 2004 along with an 8.2M rework of Bear Lake Road. The one downside of the park-n-ride is that there is no water, so fill up before you come. If you start early enough, the wait time for a shuttle will be less. Due to some folks who got lost on their way to the park, we ended up getting on the shuttle an hour later than expected (around 11 AM). The hordes had arrived and there was a very long line of tourists waiting for their glimpse of Alberta Falls. Be prepared to embrace, literally, your fellow man if you arrive late.

Ok, I am snobbish about Rocky Mountain National Park. Hike more than 3 miles up a trail and the number of people you will see falls off exponentially. Most visitors never make it to Black Lake, Sky Pond, Flat Top, Hallet Peak, or Andrew’s Tarn. These are all worthy destinations if you can stand being part of the herd at the beginning.

(On the right: Entering Glacier Gorge). Once at the Glacier Gorge trailhead, the route to Mills Lake climbs quickly on a wide National Park-like trail. If you are only going to Mills be sure to spend a little time at Alberta Falls. Again, I tend to blow past it on my way up and this time was the first time I had actually climbed up the rocks near the falls. This year’s runoff is amazing and the falls are spectacular, albeit at an angle so you never get a full frontal view of them.

Beyond Alberta Falls the trail continues upwards with some expansive views down the valley. It then enters Glacier Gorge itself, which on this trip felt like a line at Disney Land there were so many people plodding up its narrow shelf. Take a moment to stop watching the rocks at your feet here. The gorge is something to remark.

The trail will come to a junction a mere 0.5 miles from the lake. You can pop up to the Loch Vale from here or continue to Mills. Doing both in one day would certainly be doable. From this junction, the trail is relatively flat on its way to the lake.

View from the far end of Mills Lake

There are several things to note at Mills Lake. On the right just as you come up is a sheer wall of rock that drips with water, stains, and mosses. Nearby is a field of dead trees, which make a stark landmark for the lake in winter. A little farther on is a very large flat rock suitable for a large group lunch. One would think the ever-industrious Park Service put this rock there but alas it was the far more industrious Mother Nature. In the distance you will see a large boulder perched near the water. This glacial remnant seems to have a magnetic quality. You will see a swarm of anglers and small children orbiting its sphere of influence.

The trail continues around the left side of the lake and a stroll to its end will reveal the plateau that holds Black Lake. Unless you are just looking for the quintessential picnic spot, do wander along the lake. Your legs will enjoy the additional exercise and the views will be rewarding.

Looking down on Bear Lake Road

I gained a new appreciation for Mills Lake on this trip. It is amazing how your perspective can change when you stop to linger and admire what is around you instead of viewing all these million dollar views as just a means to an end.

Mountain Goats!

How I envy the Mountain Goat (Oreamnos americanus). Mother Nature has equipped them with all the mountain equipment they need to thrive in a high alpine environment where I have to take out stock in REI. For starters, they have a double coat, the inner one being a dense fur and the outer one being long hollow hairs. This haute couture is rated to -50F. Next time one of your buff friends says he does not need to layer, just throw the Mountain Goat in his face. These bad boys invented technical fabrics and are stylish to boot.


Speaking of boots, how much money did you spend on your last pair? Well, I wish I had the Mountain Goat’s feet. Their toes are padded for extra grip, they have a dewclaw that also allows them to cling to cliff faces that only the hardiest rock climber would dare ascend, and their hooves are cloven, which allows them to spread and grip. Take that Spiderman!

Did you know that Mountain Goats are not native to Colorado? Experts believe that the farthest south they naturally roamed was southern Wyoming. They were introduced into the state back in 1947 to provide game for hunters. In 1993 though, the Colorado Division of Wildlife made them naturalized citizens and declared them “native”. I wonder how many of the people sporting those “native” bumper stickers are doing so on similarly shady circumstances!


Despite their long beards and curved black horns, Mountain Goats are really not goats. They are actually closer to antelope and cattle. They spend their entire life on one mountain but will occasionally come down from their precipitous heights to seek out mineral licks. I think that is why I was able to get such great pictures of these goats. There was a mineral lick in the cleft of a rock that was drawing them down. When not sucking on rocks, however, Mountain Goats eat grasses, herbs, sedges, ferns, moss, lichen, twigs, and if you are not careful your topo map. And you say they are not goats…hmmm.


Bad boys of the mountain lounging on a shelf above the mineral lick
Sighting a Mountain Goat in Colorado is a blessed event. There are two prominent herds, one on Mt. Evans and another in the Chicago Basin. My envy of Mountain Goats extends to their choice of Colorado real estate. So get out there and explore Colorado and maybe you’ll be blessed too…Yodel-a yodel-a yodel-a-hee hoo!

Quandary Falls

Distance: 2.6 miles round trip
Elevation: 11,100 ft - 11,700 ft
Elevation Gain: 600 ft
Critters: Marmots
Bathroom at Trailhead: No
Dogs: Off leash

Quandary Falls near Breckenridge

Quandary Falls trail near Breckenridge Colorado is a short but popular trail to a large and scenic waterfall. The trail conditions can vary but early in the season it can be a slog through bogs, down trees, and snow drifts.

Avalanche evidence just below the falls

Looking down the creek

Quandary Falls is located in McCullough Gulch on the north side of Quandary Peak (14,265 ft) and nestled beneath Pacific Peak (13,998 ft). You get to it by driving to the south of Quandary and heading back past the summit trailhead and down into the gulch itself. Note that at one point the road splits. Stay to the left and park at the gate.

Sheer Rock

The trail begins steeply but the views of the range to the east increase as you rise. After about a half of a mile, the views disappear as the trees begin to close in. The falls are a broad cascade and can be gained via several social trails. They are surrounded by granite outcroppings and shrubbery and are backed by the summit of Quandary itself. In 2008 there was still a large ice sheet covering the stream that both my dogs raced out on. It was obvious that the whole thing could collapse at any moment and getting them back on terra firma was a nerve-wracking experience involving a great deal of shouting.
In years past I have climbed above the falls, but this year we had already spent so much time hacking our way through the trees that continuing on was not appealing. This was a fortunate decision, because we stumbled across a herd of Mountain Goats on the way back to town that we would have otherwise not seen.
Give this trail a chance if you are staying in Breckenridge, but wait until later in the season if you can. The views will not disappoint and the wildflowers should be spectacular.

Looking east just before descending back down to the car 

Colorado Pika

Ever been harassed a Pika (Ochotona princeps)? Don’t let their diminutive, guinea pig sized body fool you; these alpine dwelling rodents are feisty. Living in the nooks and crannies of rocks, they exhibit a shrill, piping cry whenever a hiker or dog nears their protective den. Related to rabbits and hares, they have short, rounded ears and no tail. I think they were put on earth to confound my dog’s, dare I say it, dog sized brain. With seemingly Machiavellian glee they shriek, peek, and hide giving my dog no end of grief. He knows something is up there in those sharp rocks. He can smell them, he can occasionally see them but he can’t get to them. The same thing goes for large predators. The Pika can taunt them too with relative impunity. Weasels and martins are another story. These flexible hunters can wiggle their way into the Pika’s rocky haven.


As the pictures in this post attest, Pikas eat greenery and will store up large mounds of verdant meadow grasses for the long winter. Since they shed their fur in both spring and fall, the Pika always looks a little scruffy. Still, with all those whiskers and rodent-ish gnawing on blades of grass who can resist these little terrors of the tundra?

Cascade Falls (Indian Peaks Wilderness)

Distance 9.4 miles round trip
Elevation: 8,345 to 9,580 ft
Elevation Gain: 1,320 ft
Critters: Moose
Dogs: Off leash until the wilderness boundary

Glacier Lilies and the raging waters of Cascade Falls

Cascade Falls is a long hike to several of the most beautiful falls I have seen in Colorado. The photos in this post do little to capture their sheer intensity and drama as they roared and tumbled in chaotic abandon. For the waterfall junkie out there, this is a must do destination.

There are two sets of Cascade Falls on the west side of the Indian Peaks Wilderness. We went to the southern set. The northern set is within the boundaries of Rocky Mountain National Park and can be reached by a 6 to 7 mile round trip journey.

Monarch Lake

The trail to Cascade Falls begins at the Monarch Lake trailhead, which is south of Lake Granby. Note that some guides will tell you to turn on Forest Service Road 125. This road is actually labeled Arapahoe Bay Road. It is not until you turn in and travel 50 yards or so that the road is labeled 125.

Monarch Lake is in itself a pleasant destination. There were many fishermen lining the dam and there is a 3.9-mile hike around the lake itself that looks worth doing. The Cascade Falls trail follows the shoreline for 0.8 miles so you’ll get some lakeside views. It then officially enters the Indian Peaks Wilderness at 1.25 miles.

Rocks along the Trail

There was so much variety and water on this trail to tantalize the senses that even though it was in the trees for much of the way, we were perfectly entertained. Going at the height of spring run off did not hurt. Buchanan and Cascade creeks were roaring and we knew the falls would be spectacular because of it.

The trail description we had found for this trail mentioned several water crossings and given the state of the rivers we were trepidatious that we would not be able to get across. Fortunately, all of the bridges over the rivers were quite stout. Two are cement and wood bridges and two are double wide split log bridges with substantial rock islands in the middle. The crossings were a piece of cake.

Where all those falls come from

There was a bit of mud on the trail due to the recent snowmelt but this reveled the tracks of a mother moose and the smaller tracks of her calf. We talked to a Ranger briefly and they mentioned that Moose traverse the entire area and do not confine themselves to the marshy areas around the lakes and meadows of the region. We did not see a Moose on the trail itself, but did see several on our way home.

There were lots of milestones along the way to help us gauge our mileage. I have already mentioned the wilderness boundary above. The first bridge is at 2.2 miles, the intersection with the Buchanan Trail is 3.2 miles, and the second bridge is at 3.3 miles. Just past this bridge is a small-unnamed fall that shoots through a narrow canyon. From here the trail rises sharply and gradually ascends into a broad valley bordered on the left by Thunderbolt Peak (11,938) and a long ridgeline. The main, highly overused section of Indian Peaks lies on the other side of that ridgeline, which caused us to snicker to ourselves. Here we were on a trail with hardly any people while just “over there” were mobs of Front Rangers trampling the wildflowers.

Looking east at Thunderbolt Peak and ridge

There are three falls that make up Cascade Falls. Each one is farther and higher up than the last. If you can’t possibly go any further, the first fall is a worthwhile destination in itself.

There is a cascade just below the first fall that twists sharply to the left on a broad shelf that was covered in a colony of Glacier Lilies (Erythronium grandiflorium). Glacier Lilies arrive soon after the snow melts along the banks of streams or in sub-alpine meadows.

Looking down a drainage

The first fall (4.2 miles, 9,340 ft) is tall and shoots outward from a wall of rock into a large pool. You can walk right up to this fall and gaze at it front the front and the side. I realized after playing with my photos from this trip that taking pictures of waterfalls is not easy. The brilliant whiteness of the water, contrasted with the dark rock surrounding them threw off the exposure.

First falls

Water torrent

Playing with shutter speed

The second fall (4.4 miles, 9.440 ft) is more of a cascade, reminiscent of the Calypso Cascades in the Wild Basin region of Rocky Mountain National Park. This year, with so much water, the cascades were practically hidden from view by the torrent of white foam. There is a large flat rock in front of the falls eminently suitable for a picnic lunch.

Second falls

The third falls (4.7 miles, 9,580 ft) is up a steep pitch and across the second and final hune-log bridge. Look back at this point and you will see that you are at the very top of the second falls and can see the lip where the water flows over the edge. Beyond the bridge, the trail to the third falls is very rocky. There were several snow banks that we slogged through and the trail was disguised as a creek flowing with bone chilling snowmelt. As with most falls, we heard the roar before be saw the water. Cutting off trail to another, frat party sized, chunk of rock revealed the third falls. This one looks like a combination of the first two. A sharp drop directs the flow of the upper portions and then turns sharply towards the viewpoint and spreads out somewhat into a wider area.

Third falls

Where to lunch may be the hardest decision you’ll make on this trail. There are so many places to lounge, and each fall is so distinctive that is hard to choose. The trip back was long and monotonous, like all long hikes, and we were heartily glad to reach the car. If you love waterfalls, this trail will not disappoint and may just become you private piece of heaven.

Lake Granby

Silver Dollar and Murray Lakes

Distance: 3.2 miles round trip to Silver Dollar Lake, 4.4 miles round trip to Murray Lake
Elevation: 11,600 ft to 12,400 ft
Elevation Gain: 800 ft
Dogs: Off leash
Tags: #mountainlake, #hiking, #coloradooutdoors, #gearguide
Nearby hikes: Squaretop Lakes, Squaretop Mountain, Shelf Lake, Mt. Beirstadt

Silver Dollar Lake looking east

At least once a year we try to pop up to Silver Dollar Lake off of Guanella Pass. You won’t burn off last night’s overindulgence on this hike, but will get a chance to enjoy three alpine lakes nestled within the jagged rocks of a couple of Colorado’s lesser known peaks: Square Top Mountain, Argentine Peak, and Mt. Wilcox. We have hiked this trail in late May, July, and September. On the early season outing, there were still large drifts of snow that impeded our progress with occasional waist deep post holing. I would recommend waiting until late July or August to try this trail. While I have yet to time it right, this trail is supposed to be excellent for wildflowers at that time of the year. In autumn the grasses are golden brown, which creates both texture and contrast with the still green shrubbery.

Naylor Lake from higher up the trail

There are three lakes on this trail. The first and largest is Naylor Lake. It is privately owned, and hikers are requested and advised to stay on the trail, which skirts the property. The trail quickly rises above this lake providing the hiker with ample views.

Silver Dollar Lake is the second lake and the final destination for most hikers. It is a small lake at the base of Square Top Mountain. On the plateau to the north is Murray Lake, the third and final lake. There is an obvious trail heading past Silver Dollar Lake up to Murray Lake. Since the trail to Silver Dollar Lake is so short, continuing to Murray Lake is a must. The trail is steep and rocky but very short (0.6 miles). There are large boulders near the lake that make great backrests. Argentine Peak is visible to the northwest.

Silver Dollar Lake looking southwest

Murray Lake

Be advised that Guanella Pass is prone to wicked afternoon thunderstorms.  I have been chased down the trail by lightening at least once if not twice at Murray Lake and another time at Square Top Lakes just on the other side of the ridge. The first time this happened we were lounging at Murray Lake against one of the afore-mentioned boulders. The sky above us was blue and there was not a cloud in the sky. We were startled out of our peaceful revelry by a clap of thunder so deep and nearby that it made our kidneys vibrate. We turned around to see a massive storm that was coming UP the valley from the east. It is a long way down to tree line from Murray Lake and lightening looks a lot thicker when viewed close up. Learn from our mistakes and always get a very early start when hiking off Guanella Pass, scan the sky in all directions, and don’t wait until you think the clouds are suitably gray before leaving. I can guarantee you your timing will be off.

The road to Silver Dollar Lake begins near the Guanella Pass campground, nine miles up from Georgetown. The road itself can be very rough. You can park one mile below the trailhead, but the route up would be a mundane jeep road through the trees.

Colorado Fox Squirrel: Friend or Foe?

Other critters: American Red Squirrel, Chipmunk, Golden-mantled Ground Squirrel

The Colorado Fox Squirrel (Sciurus niger)

Who can resist a pretty face? Certainly the Fox Squirrel (Sciurus niger) is irresistible. Its eyes are large and appealing, its fur is a ruddy Rufus brown, and its acrobatics are amusing to behold. Does the Fox Squirrel have a dark side though? The state of my Honey Locust tree might seem to suggest so.

Fox Squirrels are one of three species of squirrel in Colorado and the largest in North America. They are arboreal (live in trees) and diurnal (come out several times a day). Their diet consists primarily of seeds, which makes them the bane of backyard bird feeders. In a pinch they will eat insects, bird eggs, flowers, and buds, and when things get really bad, they will eat the bark off of trees. Enter my Honey Locust. Over the last two winters, a squirrel has been systematically eating the bark off of my Honey Locust tree. It is hard to say the level of damage it has done, but it certainly looks atrocious. I was advised to put hot pepper spray on the bark but that only resulted in the little cretin running around with a sombrero on.

I confess when I see my Honey Locust tree I get grumpy. It is certainly the potential financial loss that irks me so. Trees are expensive, and replacing twelve years worth of growth, shade, and privacy is very expensive indeed! At a visceral level, my resident squirrel seems to have taken on the persona of a gangbanger rampaging through the neighborhood, wantonly destroying property. I am ready to cart him off to squirrel juvie.

Ok, so we know you are a boy.

But then I see how the squirrel taunts both my cat and my dog. Its piercing screech and flapping tail fill me with glee, particularly knowing the cat is getting its comeuppance. My cat has a tendency to hunt for socks and when he finds one, he drags it around the house howling like a banshee. This behavior is particularly annoying at 3am. Anything that annoys the cat is fine with me.

I like squirrels because they have ‘tude! Before moving to this house, I lived in an apartment and lived on the top floor of a 3-story building. Somehow the squirrels managed to climb up the stucco, sit by the kitchen window, and annoy my cat. That was better than Survivor reruns.

I woke up recently one morning, however, thinking about the plague and realized that squirrels are RODENTS and VECTORS of disease. Just this month, 15 rodents were found dead in Denver, Arapahoe, and Jefferson Counties. We are talking the Black Death here, a disease that wiped out half of Europe. My favorite kitty tormentor could be carrying the means of ending civilization, as we know it. Can any pretty face survive that?

So what am I to do? I feel like a super delegate. Too bad the squirrel can’t buy my vote. I guess for now I’ll have to remain conflicted. Isn’t it amazing how much we are willing to overlook for a pretty face and fancy theatrics. It is the tonic of a jaded age.